Suggested Questions for Fay Klingler, who is one of the authors of:

Shattered: Six Steps from Betrayal to Recovery

1) What are you hoping will happen as a result of our having helped you attract publicity? I am hoping that individuals who find themselves in abusive situations will feel a sense of hope and find a path away from the emotional and physical violence.

2) What would you like to talk about on radio talk shows? I would like to provide a message of healing and recovery. I would like to talk about the power of the human mind and heart that allows a person to overcome all odds and emerge emotionally healthy. I would like to speak about survival skills, not just how to survive the physical ramifications of betrayal—the lack of income, being hit, self-defense steps—but survival skills that see you through the emotional trauma of betrayal to not just survive but excel.

3) What would you like to be known as? (i.e., the foremost
authority on anti-trust litigation, etc.) An expert on betrayal recovery—a leader, who knows all the ins and outs of this life-altering tragedy and how to recover and once again lead a happy, successful, and productive life.

4) If you have done interviews before on your subject, think about
those interviews for a moment. What were the five most common
questions the media usually asked you? I have spoken many times regarding my subject, but I have not yet been interviewed by the media. I expect that will come next month when Shattered is locally released. Here are five questions I would suggest the media propose to me:

a.      What is the basis of betrayal—what do you consider it to be?

b.      How do you identify betrayal?

c.      When you’ve found you’ve been betrayed, how do you get over the anger and the desire to get back at that person?

d.      What do you do to pick up the pieces and move on with your life?

e.      How do you forgive the betrayer and put the situation behind you?

5) Other than perhaps having written a book, what qualifies you to
talk about this topic? I am a successful product of what I talk about. I experienced the trauma of betrayal firsthand. I am a seasoned expert on this topic.

6) One thing that many great guests often have is a strong
personal story about what led them to do what they're doing now.
What's your personal story? In other words, why did you write this
book or create whatever it is you're promoting? Because of the experience I had—my healing from betrayal was over ten years old when I met her—I was able to help Bettyanne Bruin work through the anger, grief, and trauma surrounding her husband’s betrayal. About a year later, she asked me to write this book with her. With her help and encouragement, we put together a very powerful message that I think can benefit many, many people in the process of breaking the vicious patterns of victimization.

7) What's the problem you help people solve? We provide six healing steps for betrayal recovery. These six steps are based on an individual’s core beliefs and his or her ability to build healthy self-respect and self-value; to act, not just react; to develop strategies for creating and achieving sound goals and overcoming obstacles.

8) Is this problem serious? If so, how? The problem is universal. But when an individual learns how to defend personal values and move forward with his or her life, the otherwise downward spiral changes direction and moves up.

9) Assume that there are a lot of other people whom the media
could find to discuss this topic. What makes you different? What do
you say that others don't say? What, if anything, are you willing
to discuss that others are not? Healing from abuse takes time and a great deal of effort and “want” power. To make it work, you have to be willing to “own” your part in the betrayal so the cycle does not just repeat itself over and over. I can tell the media audience that if I can heal, so can they, and I will help them. The steps Bettyanne and I have developed act like a blueprint to success. They have been endorsed by numerous counselors and therapists. They CAN make a difference.

10) What opinion, belief, advice, or information do you have which
is "counter-intuitive" for most people (i.e., Eating steak is the
secret to losing weight or Special Interests are good for America)? Blaming will get you no where. Acting with integrity to own your part in the betrayal and focusing on your correction instead of the other party’s will improve your chances of success. Then safely defending what you stand for, your values, will allow you to relinquish control of the outcome.

11) Can you help people solve or avoid a serious problem? If so,
how would you dramatize the problem on the air?  Do you have any
stories, facts, research, audio clips, video clips, props, you
could use? Recently I spoke at a women’s club regarding this subject. Most of the women were elderly. You might think that audience was immune to these types of difficulties. But right after my talk, an older woman quickly came to me to tell about her boy friend’s girl friend calling her the night before, threatening her. A friend called early one morning and asked if she could come to talk with me “NOW.” Within minutes she was at my doorstep, crying. Taped to her stomach so her husband would not see it as she left the house were papers, proving his infidelity. Yes, I have stories. Yes, I have solutions. Bad things happen to good people every day. Good people need to be hugged and allowed to talk and given support to work through the trauma. Resiliency. You would be amazed how resilient we can all be if we have the desire to make life good in spite of our traumatic experiences.

12) When is your topic usually in the news (i.e., Valentine's Day or the Academy Awards)? Every single day.

13) Why should people care about what you have to say? Because they or someone they know will most likely have to heal from betrayal this year.

14) When has your topic been in the news (even if you were not the person who was interviewed)? Every single day.

15) What, if anything, could you do with callers or a live studio audience? For example, if you're an expert on collectibles, people could call up and ask you to tell them how much one of their collectibles is worth. I could answer questions from callers. Not knowing all the dynamics in any given situation always puts an advisor at risk of providing faulty information. However, there are certain solutions that are universal in betrayal recovery. I can help people understand that.

16) If you had to make people laugh--or at least smile a little--by
talking about some aspect of your topic, what would you talk about? The craziness of betrayal; what happens when you become aware and solvent; how the betrayer trips up, trying to cover his or her bases.

17) If you had to make people feel angry or uncomfortable by talking about some aspect of your topic, what would you talk about? If they have been betrayed, people don’t like to think of themselves as responsible in any way. Facing that aspect of healing is very uncomfortable for most individuals, but necessary.

18) If you have to raise a controversial question that relates to this topic in some way, what would that question be? Which does greater harm, physical or emotional abuse?

19) What's the biggest emotional reaction people have that is associated with this topic? Disbelief that it could happen to them. Disbelief that the system does not protect them. Disbelief that they could have contributed to it.

20) If you had to create a memorable name for yourself, what would it be (i.e. "The Human Juke Box" or "The Recipe Detective")? I am a betrayal expert and survivor.

21) What do people hate or dread the most about your topic? The fear that they may now or some day in the future be a victim of betrayal.

22) Does your topic affect men more than women or vice versa? Betrayers do not discriminate. Men and women are both betrayed. Victims include the wealthy and the poor, the young and the old, the educated and the uneducated.

23) How many people (clients, patients, etc.) have you helped? As our message goes out, it will help many thousands of individuals.

24) What is the one action you want people to take after hearing you on the radio or reading about you in a newspaper or trade publication (i.e., go to my website and order my book or call me about booking me for a speaking engagement. Contact me for a speaking engagement.)? Each of those things you mention in the parenthesis, along with calling a spade a spade. I mean by that, I want people to be aware of what is happening around them and defend their values. In the process they will stop the enabling of betrayal.

25) Is there anything else you want us to know? Life can be sweet. Even with difficult challenges in life, there can be joy and happiness when good choices are made.

26) Where can people buy your book?